small incident, big lesson

By unknown,


Who do you think is in control of your feelings and thoughts? Is it you? Give it some thought.

Suppose I say you are the most noble person I have ever met in my life, that I would give anything to be like you, that you are my role model and I literally worship you. How would you feel? Great! Now suppose I say you are a worthless loser with nothing to achieve in life. How do you feel? Saddened?

As you can see, many times our feelings may be governed and subtly controlled by the opinion of others. It contributes to the reason why happiness for so many is a desirable, yet fleeting experience. Real happiness is found within – it is that which does not depend on external factors such as what others might think of you. Everlasting happiness is derived from something deep down in our very nature that allows one to be happy and grateful for our existence here. If you are not influenced by what others think of you and can lead your life to be and do good, you can be truly happy.

Once Buddha was teaching a man who disagreed with him and started to verbally abuse him. Buddha, however, was calm and serene with a smile on his face; he remained unmoved by his comments. Seeing this, the man got even more agitated and escalated his shouting and abuse. Still, there was no reaction from Buddha.

he man, tired, asked the Buddha, "Why is it that you never respond?"
Buddha replied "If you offer me a gift and I don’t accept it, who has the gift now?"
The man replied "Of course, I do, don’t you even know that!"
Then the Buddha calmly replied, "Suppose I don’t accept your abuses, with whom do they remain?"
The man was quiet.

This small incident in the life of Buddha teaches us a great deal. Buddha realized that he can never be happy if he sought happiness from outside. It was easy for the Buddha to feel flattered when his disciples praised him and feel bitter when someone disagreed with him.

However, Buddha always remained calm and composed because his life was not controlled by others – he was in control of his life. His happiness and his outlook didn’t depend on what others thought about him, rather they came from a sense of fulfillment that came from deep within his own being.

It is easy for us to feel bitter with the people around us. It is easy to feel that life has been unfair and feel all bad about it. It is easy to feel jealous of the success of others and question God why he is being unfair. It is easy to ask ‘Why Me’ when things go wrong. However, opportunities and hurdles come in everyone’s life. The point is, if you are unfazed by them, then you can remain eternally happy. Your happiness should not depend on your success and failure or on what others think about you or how better off you are compared to your neighbor.

Only when you realize this, you can be truly happy with life.

"Happy reading"